


Strong at the Broken Places

by Cornerofmadness



Category: Prodigal Son (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst, Family, Gen, Mother-Son Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:20:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26117113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cornerofmadness/pseuds/Cornerofmadness
Summary: Jessica doesn’t know if she’s strong enough to get through this but if she isn’t, she knows she’ll lose her son.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23
Collections: August Intimacy 2020





	Strong at the Broken Places

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** Not mine, Chris Fedak and Sam Sklaver owns it
> 
> **Notes:** written for the allbingo prompt of I'm not sure I can do this.

_“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” —Ernest Hemingway_

“I'm not sure I can do this.” Jessica pushed back a lock of hair, hating that she might appear frazzled to Officer Arroyo. No, Gil. He’d asked her to call him by name since he’d been spending so much time with Malcolm ever since that was the one thing her baby had scrawled on some paper in his therapist’s office when asked what he thought would help him. 

Gil gently took her hand, sweeping his thumb back and forth over the back of it. His hands were rough, nothing like Martin’s whose hands had literally been insured, babied, all so he could go out and _butcher_ people. Gil’s hands did hard work. “I know it’s scary, Mrs. Whitly.”

“Jessica,” she replied. If she were to call him by name, then he could do the same for her. “You don’t have children, do you Gil?”

He shook his head. “I’ve not been so lucky.”

Her breath caught. Yes, it was lucky but it was also painful, and terrifying, and beautiful often all within second of each other. Children were the living embodiment of the so-called emotional rollercoaster. Ainsley broke her heart every day now for months, looking for her father everywhere. She was angry Mommy had walled up Daddy’s study. She had beaten on the walls, convinced he was back there somewhere. Finally, now she had come to believe Jessica when she said Daddy had left and wasn’t coming back. She questioned everything but at least she stopped asking about him. Ainsley talked non-stop since Martin had been taken away.

Malcolm hadn’t said a word in months. He was barely able to write out what he wanted and the only thing he had wanted was the man who sat next to her now, looking uncomfortable and awkward in her sophisticated, ever so wealthy living room. Gil had been coming over every chance he got. He would sit with Malcolm in the game room, trying to encourage him to play, to talk, to read, to do _anything_ but neither he nor she had any luck. Sje told him how much Malcolm loved being read to. Gil tried that.

It got a reaction. Not one she expected. Malcolm screamed and tore the book out of Gil’s hand, throwing it across the room. He shoved Gil hard and broke into tears. She had cradled him for what felt like hours, his little body trembling. It must have reminded him too much of his father. She should have thought of that. The therapist had suggested it might be time to put Malcolm in a psychiatric hospital for children so he could get full time help.

She had thought long and hard about that, getting little sleep, even less than her son did. He screamed and fought in his sleep. He ran through the house and once nearly falling down the long staircase. He could have been killed. After that, she’d started sleeping in a chair in his room, leaving her body sore and stiff. Once she had called Gil late in the evening after a very bad episode with Malcolm. He brought the boy down to the game room and let him sleep on the couch next to him as they watched some dvds he’d brought of old Star Trek shows. She’d never let Malcolm watch much TV but he liked the science fiction show or at least he quieted. She had spent the night on the love seat because even though Gil was an officer, he was a stranger really and a man. She trusted him but what if he had sick ulterior motives for wanting to help Malcolm. She’d been wrong about that, thank god because who else did she have?

Her friends had abandoned her. Some had literally threatened her with trespass at their charity functions, to have her thrown out or arrested like a common criminal. Only a pitiful handful would even speak to her all because of what Martin had done. Some truly believed she had known what her husband was doing and helped him and had no trouble telling her that to her face. Others thought she had to be an idiot to not of known as if he were coming home drenched in blood or taking his victims apaert in her basement or something. She could count the people who truly believed her when she said she had had no idea on her fingers.

In the past few weeks, Jessica had taken solace in Gil. Those dark, amazing eyes of his held nothing but kindness and warmth. When she had finally broken two weeks ago, he held her, a woman he barely knew, in his arms and let her cry herself out against the crook of his neck, never complaining. His was a gentle soul and being pressed against his chest, those strong arms around her, Jessica felt safe. It was then she realized just how unsafe she felt, how much fear had become the background of her life.

“I'm not sure I can do this,” she repeated.

“We don’t have to do it, Jessica. It was merely a suggestion.”

Jessica remembered how Malcolm’s face had lit up at the suggestion. He hadn’t looked that engaged in weeks. She’d talked it over with his therapist who thought it would be good for Malcolm. She’d mentioned it to her mother who thought she’d lost her mind. Of course her mother had never thought much of the choices she made. Gil might be right. This was exactly what Malcolm needed. Life was only going ot get harder from here. There would be a trial. In fact, Gil was worried he might have to cut contact with them temporarily because of it. The prosecutor was making noises about him being too close to a witness. A witness, her son should never be forced into such a role at such an age. Jessica speared Martin again in her mind. She needed to kill the memory of him. At least it was easy to learn to hate what he was putting his son through.

“I’m just afraid, Gil. What if he wakes up and needs his mother? What if he’s afraid the whole time?”

“You can call him every day. And Salem is not that far from here. I can be back in hours with him if it’s too much for him.”

“He has always wanted to go there. I have no idea why. All those poor people accused of witchcraft.” She shook her head. “We were supposed to have a relative who was there at the time. Did I tell you that?”

“No. You told me that your family has been on this property for over two hundred years.”

There were some bemusement in his tone. Jessica didn’t doubt his people hadn’t been here nearly as long as the Miltons or the Whitlys. “We have. Anyhow, Salem is morbib but if that’s what Malcolm wants to see, that’s what he’ll get. Are you sure this isn’t a hardship?”

“I wouldn’t have volunteered to take him sight seeing if it were. I have vacation time. We’re only going for a long weekend. It might do him good to get out of this house. He’s terrified of the girl in the box he thinks was in the basement.”

Jessica shuddered, wrapping her arms around herself. “I can’t even imagine what caused him to dream that. It had to be some of what you found in my husband’s study. He wouldn’t have told Malcolm would he?”

“I’d like to think not,” Gil replied but of course it was a pure emotional reaction. He had no way of knowing unless something had come up in interrogation not that he’d have been in on that. Still he might have heard things around the station. He’d certainly known that Shannon had been horrible to Malcolm. It wasn’t Martin behind Malcolm’s mutism, well not entirely. Those damn detectives treating him like he was his father’s little helper had played a large role.

Jessica sighed. “It’s hard to let go of his hand, Gil. I truly don’t know if I can do that.”

“Jessica, you could come with us. You and the kids can stay in one room. I’ll have my own.”

She shook her head. It was tempting, maybe a little too much. “People will talk.”

He chuckled softly. “People always talk.”

Of course they did but he wasn’t the one taking a huge step down if they were to date. God, what a horrible thought. She hated it even crossed her mind but she knew her circle of people. She didn’t need to hand them one more reason to ostracize her but it was tempting, oh so very tempting.

She waved her hands. “No, this is about Malcolm. He might not mind if I come along but Ainsley is too young for all of the history things he wants to go to. She’ll be bored and she’ll fuss, and then it’ll be full on tantrums. He won’t enjoy himself. I trust you, Gil. I hope he’ll behave for you.”

“Don’t worry, Jessica. Malcolm is never a problem.”

Jessica laughed and then bit it back before it became hysterical laughter. She teetered on the edge. “You don’t know him well. Malcolm has quite the temper on him when he doesn’t get his way. I’d take seeing that little temper right now. Anything would be better than this blank slate thing he’s got going on.”

“Well hopefully his doctor is right and this will be helpful. He needs a break from here. Maybe getting away from where everything happened will do him good.”

“That’s the reason I’m considering this. We’ve tried everything else.” Jessica took a deep breath, finally discovering the courage for this. She raised her voice and called. “Malcolm, please come here.”

A few moments later he ran in. She saw the excitement in his eyes. Letting him go was the right thing to do. This would be good for him. “Are you sure you want to go to Salem with Gil by yourself?

He nodded frantically. 

Jessica smiled. He was happy and that’s all she could ever want. “I’ll help you back.”

Malcolm bounced on the couch and threw his arms around him. Jessica drew strength from his little arms, the joy on his face gone too long. Gil would take care of him. For the first time in a long time Malcolm would be already if she just let go. She could do this and she would. There was nothing she wouldn’t do for her children. She would see them well no matter what it took and a vacation with Gil Arroyo seemed like a small price to pay. Jessica smiled at him over the top of Malcolm’s head, and he returned it. In that moment, Jessica believed things would be all right. She was strong enough to get through this.


End file.
